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VPointNine

Laughs or Groans cause of bots?

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I'm curious as to what moments you've laughed at or just stared at in disbelief because of the bots. I'm not just talking about ramming or yolo torping, either.

Here's my example: Yesterday, I died during the later part a match, so I stick around and watch till the end. I notice two friendly bots just chilling next to each other on a capped point, not doing anything (which isn't uncommon from what I've seen). All of a sudden one bot torpedoes the other one, killing it, and finally starts moving in another direction towards the last remaining red. I was thinking, "Ok now. Now I've seen it all."

But I bet I haven't. What have you seen?

Edited by VPointNine

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30 minutes ago, VPointNine said:

All of a sudden one bot torpedoes the other one, killing it, and finally starts moving in another direction towards the last remaining red.

I guess negotiations fell through.

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2 minutes ago, Carrier_Ikoma said:

I guess negotiations fell through.

Seemed like it. I could almost some imaginary argument happening when the one finally thought, "Oh you think I won't?'

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15 minutes ago, RipNuN2 said:

One probably told the other that "yo momma was a toaster".

 

Yo motherboard so fat, her OS stands for oversize.

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5 hours ago, VPointNine said:

I'm curious as to what moments you've laughed at or just stared at in disbelief because of the bots. I'm not just talking about ramming or yolo torping, either.

Here's my example: Yesterday, I died during the later part a match, so I stick around and watch till the end. I notice two friendly bots just chilling next to each other on a capped point, not doing anything (which isn't uncommon from what I've seen). All of a sudden one bot torpedoes the other one, killing it, and finally starts moving in another direction towards the last remaining red. I was thinking, "Ok now. Now I've seen it all."

But I bet I haven't. What have you seen?

I've seen so many dumb things people do against bots.  Usually it's by BBs, but idiocy knows no bounds.

 

I'm playing some BB in the middle of the map.  A fellow player is playing a North Carolina east of me.  Naturally we sail south towards the cap.  I'm handling my business.  I take note of a bot Mogami sailing straight to my NC teammate.  I'm not one to insult a man's intelligence unless they deserve it, but I remember thinking to myself, "I hope that NC realizes Mogami has torps, and he's charging right at it."

The smart move would be for NC to turn away and shell the charging bot Mogami, thereby negating all risk of getting torped by a charging ship.  But he just kept sailing full speed ahead.  Sure enough, the bot Mogami just eats a citadel or two from the bow but still alive to pass NC's starboard side and do a point blank torpedo drop, killing the NC player in the attack.  I only shook my head.

 

I remember during last summer, I was playing Enterprise, was helping this player Iowa for a bit.  We had together sank some ships but I spotted a bot Schors charging Iowa.  I pinged the map as a friendly warning.  It'd be a while before my planes are rearmed to help, but I figured Iowa would blap Schors.  He had all kinds of range, it was about 16km when the BB started shooting at Schors.  Yet the bot Schors made it to our stationary, bow camping Iowa to torpedo and sink him with 4.5km torps.

 

I remember solo-queuing for Operation Narai once.  Yes, dumb move on my part and I will own up to that.  I was playing Scharnhorst.  There was a Hood player also and we were the only two BBs of the team.  Usually, especially with a randomly put together Narai team, I feel a lot better with 1 more BB but hey, we deal with what we got.  It was very early in Narai.  Hood player is sailing along and I'm watching him struggle to hit anything (Hood has sh*tty guns).  It was so early in Narai that when the 2nd group of CLs spawn, he took his Tier VII Hood and purposely rammed a stationary Tier IV CL.  Hood naturally lost a lot of HP and I was watching him bleed even more HP from Fires and Floods.  The idiot was celebrating like it was an accomplishment.  Then when the enemy bot Lexington sent its first wave of bombers, he didn't even know Hood had that really fancy Defensive Fire and let the planes come over and nuke him.  Freaking IDIOT!  I was upset because now I was the ONLY BB left for Narai.

 

A recent event.  Azuma releases.  I watched some dude in one play Tears of the Cruisers Desert.  He takes Azuma into the confined waters in the middle of the epicenter, with the cluster of islands north of the central island.  This moron got himself sandwiched by bot Neptune and Hipper and he ate like a gazillion torps from their cross drops.  Those Cruisers weren't hidden either, they were spamming shells and it should have been obvious where they were, but no, he charged in and got torpedoes like a chump by bots.

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Watching two 'friendly' 'bot BBs sit at the corner of an island ramming each other for most of a match.  At least they were just getting in each others' way and not obstructing a 'warm body' player - of course, they were totally useless...

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On 4/24/2019 at 10:04 PM, VPointNine said:

But I bet I haven't. What have you seen?

Derping along in my Ranger in co-op, I was spotted by TWO Bismarcks. I was already low and thinking this must be the end so I decided to race for the nearest cap on autopilot and try to take it or at least freeze it for as long as I could while spamming planes.

Now you would expect that TWO Bismarcks would either shell me at moderate range (about 10km when first spotted), open up with their secondaries, or both.

Wouldn't you?

 

Nope.

I ended up with them both parked just clear of my ship, less than a boat-length away, for what seemed like an eternity while my secondary gunners went nuts and I tried to launch as many air attacks as I could. It was that freaking stupid. They literally sailed RIGHT UP TO ME AND STOPPED, without even completing a ram or firing their main guns. I can't remember how it ended - I think one of them finally woke up and shot me - but it's the strangest thing I ever did see in co-op.

Edited by Ensign_Cthulhu

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1 minute ago, Ensign_Cthulhu said:

Derping along in my Ranger in co-op, I was spotted by TWO Bismarcks. I was already low and thinking this must be the end so I decided to race for the nearest cap and try to take it or at least freeze it for as long as they could. Now you would expect that TWO Bismarcks would either shell me at moderate range (about 10km when first spotted), open up with their secondaries, or both?

Wouldn't you?

I ended up with them both parked just clear of my ship, less than a boat-length away, for what seemed like an eternity while my secondary gunners went nuts and I tried to launch as many air attacks as I could. It was that freaking stupid. They literally sailed RIGHT UP TO ME AND STOPPED, without even completing a ram or firing their main guns. I can't remember how it ended - I think one of them finally woke up and shot me - but it's the strangest thing I ever did see in co-op.

Sometimes, if you are not moving, say because you ran in to an island or something,  the bots forget about you.

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The occasional bot who is chasing you hard and you're concentrating and then you hear the message you were dreading TORPS!, and you look and the bot fired them from the other side of their boat towards... nothing!

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1 minute ago, Efros said:

The occasional bot who is chasing you hard and you're concentrating and then you hear the message you were dreading TORPS!, and you look and the bot fired them from the other side of their boat towards... nothing!

I had one bot teammate (pre 8.0) where we were the only two left alive.  Me in a Myogi.  WallE was driving the T4 french cruiser.  We were heading for the last known position of the CV, and WallE decides to drop off a load of torps with no ship in sight.

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19 minutes ago, Ensign_Cthulhu said:

They literally sailed RIGHT UP TO ME AND STOPPED, without even completing a ram or firing their main guns.

I have seen Skynet's stupid brother do this on more than one occasion.  The last couple of times it was destroyers.  I actually thought they were yoloing (like they do) but they just drove up and parked.

Torping islands seems to be a thing with them as well.  It's like they don't even see the island.  That could actually be the case.  I've seen it enough times.

I've also seen SuperBot on a few occasions.  That's the one that just goes on a rampage, killing everything in sight and finishing on top of the leader board.  I've seen several 4 kill games from SuperBot.

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10 minutes ago, Captain_Slattery said:

Torping islands seems to be a thing with them as well.

Things overheard in T10 DD bot chat.

"Hey, :Tsamados:, you see that crab on the shoreline? Give him all three racks; he :etc_swear: deserves it."

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I've often thought that Superbot is actually human, put in by WG to troll us COOP players.

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OK this one isn't cos of bots but it down to sloppy programming. This happened to me this evening, as you can see the game says I failed to get 3 citadels to complete the Personal Order, and in the next screen oh, 3 citadels. I finished the match with a citadel strike on a Missouri, obviously the death of the MO was recorded before the cit and the Personal Order failed before the cit also. Not the first time this sort of thing has happened to me.

 

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I've been torped twice by friendly bots. I've been told it's my fault for being between them and enemy bots. 

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2 hours ago, CTMAADawson said:

I've been torped twice by friendly bots. I've been told it's my fault for being between them and enemy bots. 

I've had friendly bots fire torpedoes at me when I'm BEHIND them and all the enemies are at the front of us.

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