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TheShipMonk

Diary of a Ship Monk

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Dear Diary,

Today I embark on a new journey. A journey of one million experience. For it is said that who over fulfills such quest may lay hand on the ultimate ship: Yamato. But it is also a journey of patience and humility (paradoxically enough), for I shall bring with me none but my skill and knowledge (whatever I have anyways), and carry on, as a poor man would, with none but what the Gods of WoW provide (a.k.a. free loading). In my alter life I have fallen to the lusts of premiums and luxuries, and with them my soul was lost. It is time to repent, it is time breath, and it is time to look for true meaning (or an excuse to write something in the forum other than rants).

"Now it...begins."

At the foot o the trail is the all too mash-able Hashidate. A patrol gun boat which, contrary to what the tech tree might suggest, was brought to life in the 1940s. It has the gun caliber of a destroyer, but with the stealth, maneuverability, and torpedoes replaced with a citadel breach-able with a Deku Tree slingshot.   

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Have you noticed something? Or the absence of things maybe? Look how clean and simple this UI is. No missions, campaigns, or challenges. No consumables, camouflages, or signals. No tech trees or modules. No free XP or commander XP. Just a ship and a Battle button. Makes you wonder: What else does one need? 

Moving on. Our first battles against those imbecilic bots was one with ease, and the Gods decided to double our bounty. Just one battle in, and we are ready to acquire our next ship: Chikuma. In it's stock form, this 1912, Ritz-cracker-armored ship is a metaphor for big government waste, with nothing but 4 awkwardly placed guns that shoot in all the directions you did not aim at.

589936224_Screenshot(4).thumb.png.6973ab2f12f2135b74c17b6a907dba38.png

Soon enough, though, we added a few extra guns to make this boat serviceable, and soon later we unlocked the curse and blessing of "Random Battles". No not the one you're used to. For us noobs (or pretend-to-be-noobs), the match is but a 3 vs. 3 of humans accompanied by a swarm of bots. This is despite being only 18 seconds into the maximum wait time of 1 minute. And boy are those bots amazing. One can truly marvel at the site of two destroyers in full stand still, throwing HE at each other from a mere 1 km and still missing most of the shots. On the bright side, it does (with some lucky charms) give some satisfying results:

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A few more of these and I was ready to make the next move: Tenryu. A breath of fresh air, this late 1920s ship is. 7 km, 57 knot, triple torpedo launcher at tier 3? I'll take two, please. The upgraded hull is but a baby cherry on top. I shall opt to skip the range upgrade, as I have for the previous two ships, for our next reward is just around the corner. Today I shall stop here. 

923171154_Screenshot(14).thumb.png.b2e52cd5f9c2599bf49ef17be5718994.png

Oh, you've noticed! Yes the UI is already getting busy. I have already unlocked Free XP, as well as Containers and (believe it or not) Daily Shipments:

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The cruel Gods are already testing me. I shall take their offering, but reject their seduction.

Until text time, may the waters bring your mind to peace.

Edited by TheShipMonk
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Enjoy your journey.

There are a few surprises in store for you mostly good.

 

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sorry monk, Yamato's not the ultimate ship, that crown and title belongs to the conqueror. a ship so hated by others, do to the flames that are fired from its guns. Legend has it if you die by the flames of a conqueror your soul will forever burn in the afterlife!:Smile_ohmy:

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28 minutes ago, BladedPheonix said:

sorry monk, Yamato's not the ultimate ship, that crown and title belongs to the conqueror. a ship so hated by others, do to the flames that are fired from its guns. Legend has it if you die by the flames of a conqueror your soul will forever burn in the afterlife!:Smile_ohmy:

Not only that, but the Conqueror is capable of regenerating from even the most grievous of battle injuries in a manner so quickly that it would makes Deadpool's healing factor look quaint.

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4 minutes ago, 1Sherman said:

Not only that, but the Conqueror is capable of regenerating from even the most grievous of battle injuries in a manner so quickly that it would makes Deadpool's healing factor look quaint.

...OK whyed you have to say that! now I want a deadpool skin for my Conqueror!:Smile_amazed:

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48 minutes ago, BladedPheonix said:

...OK whyed you have to say that! now I want a deadpool skin for my Conqueror!:Smile_amazed:

Now I have image in my head.

Though Deadpool is the perfect captain for the Conqueror.

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1 minute ago, AJTP89 said:

Now I have image in my head.

Though Deadpool is the perfect captain for the Conqueror.

almost perfect. he's Canadian remember?:Smile_veryhappy:

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1 minute ago, Chobittsu said:

This guy is goin' places

not likely, he's a statue choby.:Smile_veryhappy:

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7 hours ago, BladedPheonix said:

not likely, he's a statue choby.:Smile_veryhappy:

If the Easter Islanders could walk their giant head statues into place, then a Buddha with a diary on the grind to tier 10 can go on a boat.

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23 hours ago, BladedPheonix said:

sorry monk, Yamato's not the ultimate ship, that crown and title belongs to the conqueror. a ship so hated by others, do to the flames that are fired from its guns. Legend has it if you die by the flames of a conqueror your soul will forever burn in the afterlife!:Smile_ohmy:

A Pen is mightier than a...uhm...fire? Something like that. 

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21 hours ago, clammboy said:

I really enjoyed that even though I have no idea what you are talking about +1 to you .

That's what I told my last date. Alas, their humor was on cool down.

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14 hours ago, 1Sherman said:

If the Easter Islanders could walk their giant head statues into place, then a Buddha with a diary on the grind to tier 10 can go on a boat.

I drive a Hyundai, actually. Good mileage, poor armor.

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14 hours ago, 1Sherman said:

If the Easter Islanders could walk their giant head statues into place, then a Buddha with a diary on the grind to tier 10 can go on a boat.

don't the cat statues and the swollen testical bagers in japan move too?:cat_bubble:

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